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  • Ela Senghera

5 Ways to Overcome Your Fear of Rejection

Updated: Dec 7, 2022

The fear of rejection can be paralysing. Fear of rejection often stops us from implementing changes in our lives or from taking risk. Quite often in life we are left wondering what our live would be like if we did take that next step, if we did take that risk. We human don't like change. We dread it. It makes us feel uneasy. It takes lots of courage to put yourself in the circumstances where our ideas might be rejected or worse still - laughed at. For so many of us, this fear of rejection can be crippling.. We know what we want but so often we ''freeze'' and are unable to do anything..

Ignoring the issue and hoping it will go away will only make it worse. ''Untreated'' fear of rejection may become worse over time, placing ever-increasing restrictions on our life.

If you are suffering from social anxiety or a fear of rejection, the below techniques can help you learn to overcome it

1. Allow Yourself to be Vulnerable Being vulnerable means allowing yourself to take a risk. Your vulnerability is one of the best things about you. Fear of shame is often the root of the fear of rejection. Shame exists to prevent us from acting foolishly, but too much of it will make you feel defeated. Shame can feel awful when it occurs but it never lasts too long. But no matter how heavy it feels - you can manage it. So allow yourself to be vulnerable, connect to that part of you, the part that feels low. Try to understand where does your fear come from? What is the reason for it and let it in. Feel it but don't let it stop you living your life.

2. Get used to Feeling Rejected Putting yourself out there and seeking out rejection will help you become less sensitive to it. And to be honest a big part of our lives is about how you deal with rejection. So it's important to develop resilience against it. Although it can feel very challenging at first, the fear of rejection will gradually feel less intense. So the more you believe in yourself and the more risk you take, the stronger your confidence and resilience will become. Eventually, your mind will respond positively to any circumstance that contains the possibility of rejection as opposed to reacting in fear.

3. Let Go of Your Desires We spend our time imagining what it would be like to achieve what we want. We often imagine if it's worth taking the risk... However, all of this is just speculation on our end. We don't experience what it would be like to not take the risk at all. Did you ever decide to let go of your desires, and then give yourself some time to truly experience what that feels like? If not - try it! Turn your back to it, walk away, and feel it. If something is extremely important to you, it's very possible that choosing to give up on it without a fight would leave you feeling awful. Rejection might hurt, but it won't hurt as badly as giving up on your dreams.

4. Take the Hit Throughout our life, we will often be subjected to risky situations, situations where we are unsure what to do..what step to take. Living half-heartedly is the only way to avoid it, and you are worth far more than that. Risk always carries the chance for both happiness and grief; winning and losing, feeling proud and feeling embarrassed. Leaving ourselves open for a reward exposes us to the risk of rejection. While the rejection won't break you, regret can make you feel sad or depressed. Regret has a long-lasting power over us, and seems to be more present in our older years. Fear of rejection often stems from lack of trust in ourselves.

So learning to trust yourself

5. Acknowledge and Discuss Our lives are based on stories and there are lots of stories we can tell about rejection. What is yours? Why not sharing it with someone? When you share your rejection story with someone else you give yourself an opportunity to discuss the lesson learnt. This story will reveal the best parts of yourself — the uplifting, humorous, brave, and resilient pieces of you that might otherwise remain hidden - even to you. It will really uncover your inner strength and inner power. And what if rejection wasn't the end but rather the start of something new? It could be the start of a new relationship, a new career or a new life chapter. Rejection opens doors. So dont see it as the end but rather a beginning. Or as one popular saying goes: ''Feel the fear and do it anyway''...

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